Is It Venus Retrograde, or Are You Thinking About Me Too? I think the universe is trying to reunite me with someone who hasn't even bothered to text me. And honestly? I'm starting to believe it. Tell me something… Is it Venus retrograde? Because, my love, I need an explanation. And before you laugh, just listen. I was perfectly fine. Minding my business. Living my life. Being a responsible adult. Doing adult things. And then, out of nowhere… YOU. Again. In my dreams. In my thoughts. In songs that have absolutely no business playing when I’m trying to forget you. And now I’m supposed to believe this is a coincidence? Hhayibo! No, babe. Something is happening. I don’t know what you’ve been doing on your side of the universe, but over here, the spiritual Wi-Fi is acting suspicious. Because why am I suddenly remembering your voice? Why am I smiling at memories like somebody has just sent me a good morning text? And why, when I hear a certain song, do I immediately think, You’re thinking about me, aren’t you? Don’t deny it. You probably felt something too. Maybe you were driving somewhere, minding your own business, when our song came on. Maybe you paused. Maybe you smiled. Maybe you stared out the window and wondered what I’m doing these days. Actually… I hope you did. Because if I’m out here losing my composure over a man from my past, I would appreciate some spiritual reciprocity. PLEASE. I cannot be the only one attending this imaginary reunion. And listen, I know what you’re going to say. “It’s just nostalgia.” Nostalgia, my foot! Why now? Why this week? Why is Closer by Slum Village playing at every turn? Why this dream that felt so real I woke up in a warm sweat, looking at the ceiling? Explain THAT. Because I have started noticing things. Numbers. Songs. Little coincidences. And yes, I know the algorithm knows my business, but what if the UNIVERSE also has a little algorithm of its own? What if every time I think of you, something shifts on your side? What if you reach for your phone, think about messaging me, and then put it down because you don’t know what to say? What if we’re both pretending that all these years have made us strangers, when somewhere, deep down, we’re still curious? Oh, this is getting dangerous. Because now I’ve imagined the conversation. The awkward hello. The little laugh. The moment our eyes meet and we both realise that some things are impossible to explain. And don’t even get me started on the hug. Because in my imagination, that hug has a soundtrack, cinematic lighting and a full orchestra. Hans Zimmer himself is composing the background music. Netflix has already bought the rights. And Venus? Venus is the executive producer. But let me behave. Let me drink some water. Let me remember that I have a whole life to attend to. Because the most embarrassing part of all this? You haven’t even done anything. You’re probably somewhere, asleep. Meanwhile, I’ve written three imaginary conversations, interpreted four cosmic signs and mentally cast you in the leading role of a movie you don’t even know you’re auditioning for. Yhu! Anyway… If you’re thinking about me too, you can just say that. I’m not saying you should. I’m simply saying the universe has excellent timing. And if this is Venus retrograde… Then, respectfully, Venus, my sister… WHAT EXACTLY ARE YOU TRYING TO DO TO ME? Because I was minding my business. And now? Now I’m missing a man who hasn’t even texted me… yet.